Crescent Whirlwind

The darkness is seeping through the heart again Living becomes just another blaming game Expectations crossing the boundaries relentlessly Nightmares keep the track patiently... The world seems to be a huge question mark People around as usual turn their back And I find myself in the same mindset again Going round and round all over in sane The life has stopped searching for the meaning Existence has become the moral binding Fake is the world I want to live in Pseudo are the shadows of people, I believe in Negating is the only thing my mind is doing; Accepting is the thing it should be doing Thoughts run continuously and make it all worst The eyes never stop wiping and emotions just burst As usual, I find no way out People move away and I go nowhere Asking question 'why' is the routine without answer I live again in a paradoxical nightmare

The year has gone by. Time flew unknowingly...The day used to start at 5.30 am and end at around 1am.That's the only same thing around. Things have changed from WNS to Indian Magic Eye and college and yes,Purushottam too. Friends are new...Work is different...Working culture is different...Approach is different...Some friends got married, some are now even pregnant, some lost their jobs, some got promoted, some newly found love, some still searching for it, some got betrayed, some got hurt, some found new trust, some lives changed, some got reincarnated...and then where was I ,all those times?...I was a silent apprehender every time...and a silent observer sometimes....Some people left their remarks forever to remember, some silently walked away, some new entered with the promise to forever stay...I discovered the hidden/unknown self..realised many things...lend an hearing ear to some and asked for the same from some....people...people. People.....It’s always people who walk in you

[Posting as per gogo's request ;-) its in marathi ] Ek Shaniwar,asach alshi ugwawa ani nantar ekdum rahatawar chalnarya gadgyala motari itki gati milavi itka vegvan diwas asel asa watla tari hota ka kaal? Ratri zoptana ek ashantata,sakali achanak parat vadalasarkhi yavi ani mihi ti sahajtene par karavi...parat don wawtali uthawyat..apratyaksharitya me gumphlya gelelya ani tyatunahi me sahajtene chalat jave ... Chalnarya botivar vegvan varyamadhe sheed lawaycha prayatna karawa me ani ti dolaymantahi samarasun anubhavavi me.. Santh panyat duchmalat chalnari bot achanak bhowra alyavar thodishi helkavi ani tarihi me ti atmavishwasane pudhe nyavi... Nantar akash datun yave,manat ek ashanka ani dhuwandhar kosalnarya jaldhara... saglach rikampan dhuvun kadhnarya,manatla,ajubajuachahi... Janu tyasathich tyani firun janma ghetla asava mazyatlya 'me' cha asnahi punha navyani janmale.. swachchha dhuvun nighalelya rastyavarun manasokta nhaleli me,hirvyakancha zadancha pananvarun padnar

To the wandering soul within, For a last few weeks, I have observed some changes happening within and outside too. Some things you realize later on, I agree. Some new things enter into your life, I agree. Priorities change, of people, of work, I agree. But while the simultaneous happening is being taking place, how often you just get carried away? How often you really live that moment with the known "you”? Everything in life has a reason and not everything comes for a season. Everything in our life has some place and sometimes the places are things driven. You just have no right on them. Sometimes you find yourself guilty for many reasons, which sometimes are known and sometimes unknown. You get circumvented with the guilty feeling and try to run away from people who you think are suffering cause of you, you run away from your own self. Everything starts bothering you, the "why me?" feeling is up on your mind. Suddenly you feel everyone around is being so erratic. You hu

Walking alongside the road a random thought strikes the mind and makes me think beyond crossroads…Just don’t know the reason of the mind drift but deliberately its happening. Life is not just a crossroad but there are many main roads, tunnels, underground roads, connecting flyovers, underwater gangways, unending highways, and some naughty pathways too. Now when I take a look back at my life, simply wonder how could I miss them all? Or is it that I just ignored them? Or may be knowingly denied their existence?  Every road is a learning experience .Just that your preconceptions make you think it’s a crossroad. Once you adopt the vision to get the zeal and touch and feel of the newer path, there are so many things lying downside and waiting just for you. Incidences may be very trivial but surely give you the feeling “Yes, this is what I was searching for” And you don’t have to go beyond any horizons in their search. It’s all within. Perhaps like a denied creature. I’m really amazed over l

Life has taken a bit set back now days...as in nothing productive is happening but the crescent whirlwinds are high.The emotional turmoil is driving me crazy to the walls.A small thing happend in my life and suddenly the circumstance around me  changed drastically.I am now a days forced to accept the philosophy which I never trusted earliar.As in I could never ever guess the practical relevance of it and now I am actually experiencing it.It is so weird when you are left with no other choice than to go by logical way.I denied the existence of some things and those only happening in my life in such a short span.Life is really playing Ringa-Ringa-Roses [:)]  I don't know how am I suppossed to react in this case,so I am just enjoying the very moment.And Yes I am happy ...

Sometimes the thoughts flow so easily and sometimes it is so hard to gather them together.They are like the stars dispersed in the sky and randomly floating through the mind....I could never really guess their significance and I just don't know why??Sometimes things become so erratic and I feel so burst out.It's so hard when you only don't know what's going on in your mind so far...I start feeling left out from anywhere and everywhere.Things which were supposed to be mine are not suddenly mine any more.Everyone is going away or is it simply I am walking away?

Today my own feelings playing Hide-And-Seek with me What I want is so different from what I wanted What I feel is so different from what I felt What I see is just not matching with what I want to see The urge is coming right from inside My own feelings keeping me aside I want something, which will take me for while I need the assurance to walk that extra mile The emotional turmoil is driving me crazy to the walls The hidden spaces are now moving away from the thoughts Somewhere something becomes crystal clear,I feel happy Suddenly something disappears,I feel scary I want to let go some things and wait for their arrival.... May be I never expected those things to stay forever This confessional dilemma is adding to my restlessness What I'm currently looking for is just peace for decades I don't want to go beyond expression of reality I'm just not bothered about the things and their feasibility My mirror image today is now a perfect stranger My gestures have also become a part

I ceased feeling anything when I accepted the absence of you in my life ! Things are difficult to accept than they actually are ! And once I accept then what remains in my life? The philosophy beyond acceptance was never meant for me... Then by declining the reality what did I get? If the happiness of even from sunrise to sunset was never there in my life, then why at all I am born? If compramise is the only fact left then why not an animal's life? If the emotions only waging a war against emotions then what's the reason I am alive?

Why do some people walk in our life And walk out too as the days pass by? And then why dont they take away those memories too? Why dwell in our mind those memories? why those memories have to itch so hard,come what may... With the blowing breeze new people,new memories and again new pain If those people are never going to stay back in the life why at all do they walk in?? To destroy the little world?

I wish you could be the one I always craved for, I wish you could be that shine I alwyas asked for, I wish you could be the face I always waited for, I wish you could be the wish I always wished for, I wish you could be the world I want to live in, I wish you could be the colour I want my life in, I wish you could be that path I left, I wish you could be that feel I felt, I wish you could be the sky I always wanted, I wish you could be the dream I got enchanted... It can go on like anything so am leaving it incomplete...cause its still incomplete [;)]

Oneday some day I too will walk away With nothing in my hand and life just a decay, Leaving behind another mistery unvealed letting go all my dreams unfulfilled, life merely and measurably a paradox And mind terribly tired to find the way in the middle of the rocks Putting up just another mask over the living is not helping me anymore Sooner or later I want to get out of the crossroad Sometimes the alter me wants to stuggle for the living Somehow it wants to find the reason for being The other me inside does not let her do so The dripping life of mine can't get good though A totally confused soul is seeking for a breath A virtual regret is asking for help Suddenly I feel I have found something And even before accepting it,it becomes nothing I'm fade up of myself I'm fade up me Just whiling away the time and waiting to be "me"

Something is striking on my mind Something is surely going to bang, Something is changing inside out Something really wants to come out, May be I've missed something very strong Its predominant approach is stretching for a long, May be I've gone farther,leaving something back Its unfelt existence is patting on the back, Somewhere something has actually gone wrong the leaves are blowing without the wind on, The circumstance signaling the life in blue I can't find any reason which could be true Things are slipping out of my hand Somewhere something for sure is going wrong... It's really very hard to see the things going far, as if they were never mine and just initiated the laugh, sadly I want to hold everything tight, merely I want everything, without any fight...

Kyon apneaap ka khauf lekar jite hai hum jindagi ? Kyon aanjaan sadkonpe hum ban jate hai ajnabi? kyon yaadonke saye mein hum kuchh keh dete hai unkahi kyon chahte hai chhupane aansu raaat ke parde mein har kahi? kyon kafila saath hote bhi mehsoos karte hai tanhai? yonk hamesha kaantonka hi rasta chunati hai majhabi? kyon rishtonka silsila tod deti hai bekhudi? kyon jeeneki chah badha deti hai khudkhushi?

Aankho mein arman liye aate hai kitne hazaro yahan sapnonke tukde lekar jite hai kitne lakho yahan har tuta khwab jina sikhati hai yeh jindagi har aansuki alag kahani bayan karti hai jindagi har saans mein chhupi maut dikhati hai yeh jindagi lekin yahan saans lena bhi sikhati hai yehi jindagi